Is it possible to single and happy?

Um yes!

Can we please stop with single awareness out there? Most say the solution to being single is getting a relationship. Being single isn’t a problem that needs a solution. Also, getting in a relationship isn’t going to solve all your problems. Disclaimer: being in a relationship isn’t bad. This is just pointing out that being single isn’t bad either.

Can we please stop putting pressure on single relatives by asking about their dating life? Sorry, 2nd cousin twice removed, but it’s NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS that I still don’t have a boyfriend.

For those of you who don’t know my personal experience with dating, I don’t have any. 23 years old and never been kissed. Yes, I know it’s shocking for most people. However, I am an expert at being single. I’ve been asked on dates, and sometimes I go out, but it never goes past that. I say this to point out that I like being single. Do you know the things you can do? ANYTHING. Your schedule can be full of things you want to do at time you want without compromising. Do you know who else was single? JESUS. Also, a partner is not your “better half”. They will not “complete you”. You are a complete version of yourself.

I have an old fashion view of dating and relationships. I never read the book “I kissed dating goodbye”, but I’ve been told that I would enjoy it. I view dating as courting with the intention of marriage. At this stage of my life, I’m still figuring myself out. I’m not ready for marriage, so why date? Do I still pick out wedding colors and baby names? Of course, it’s fun! But I’m in no hurry to walk down an aisle. Unless it’s the candy aisle on February 15.

On a more serious note. As a Christian, I believe that being single comes with it’s own responsibility. Paul writies in 1 Corinthians 7:7-8 about some people are blessed with the gift of marriage and others are blessed with singleness. The responsibility for both types of people is still to use their gifts to glorify God. If your goals in life is to get married and have kids, then that’s great! But it shouldn’t become an idol for you. God might have plans for you to accomplish before family life. Personally, I started volunteering with Operation Christmas Child. I’ve also spent time with the local food bank and Habitat for Humanity. You can use your time to minister to others using your other spiritual gifts whether it’s serving or teaching.

There are some obstacles to overcome for people who aren’t used to doing things solo. At first, it was weird for me to go to the movies alone, explore the city, tour musuems, go to the zoo, and take vacations. I don’t eat out anymore for budgeting reasons, but honestly, that one is still awkward #tableforone. BUT doing things independently can give you freedom and help you understand yourself. Treat yourself to some self-love activities. Light a candle and take a bath. Take a hike through the woods. Start journaling. Do a social media cleanse. Join a spin class. Pick up a craft. There are tons of ideas online to find ways to enjoy your alone time. Learn to understand yourself and what you want and need. Then, once you’re ready, apply that to improve future relationships. Also, being alone can bring you closer to family and friends.

Obviously this is a huge topic to tackle and I don’t have all the answers, so I’m gonna leave it here. I don’t expect this to really impact anyone single, but maybe it’ll let them know they’re not alone and it’s ok. If nothing else, it’ll get everyone to stop asking about my nonexistence dating life.

Who doesn’t want to live the life of a Sim?

I fell into a YouTube hole and discovered a series of videos that seemed to start in the second half of 2017. These YouTubers created Sims and recorded everything the Sim did for 24 hours. Now I’m not a YouTuber and I have no reason to be doing this besides the fact it sounded like a fun way to spend a Saturday. I should have known better from the videos I watched.

A week before I did my challenge, I created Kara, my alter ego. I assigned her the traits of Computer Whiz, Bookworm, Childish, Couch potato, and Natural Cook; Hopefully, giving myself an easy challenge. I built my apartment and let her loose for 24 hours. I wrote a record of activities and timestamps of Kara’s day, so I could reenact it.

Quick Notes:

-Can I just say what “Natural Cook” makes a microwave meal, bread and jam, and yogurt. I wanted real food…

-Also pointing out, there’s only one bathroom break for 24 hours.

-If you notice in the video, I added a treadmill (that I don’t have irl) to the living room in case she wanted to exercise. Praise Jesus, Kara didn’t.

So, in addition to the video, here is the schedule I recorded and my thoughts reenacting it. Scroll down to the bottom for final thoughts =)

8:00am Wake up

I took time to change and throw on some foundation before starting the day. Not everyone can look Sim perfect first thing on a Saturday morning.

8:10am Eat a microwaved meal

               Chicken Dumpling soup should be a normal breakfast meal.

8:20am Finish Breakfast

               I wasn’t able to finish all my soup for breakfast, so I saved the leftovers

8:30am Chat with someone on the computer FOR THREE HOURS

               Kara was chatting with someone named Connor and found out he was single.

               I ended up being on Facebook and Instagram for most of the time. Thank you to everyone who helped and kept me entertained. I spent an hour on the phone with a friend, not technically online but it’s still social interaction. I ended caving in the last 20 minutes and went to comment on YouTube videos because I was struggling through the last hour.

12:00pm Read Something in bed

               Kara read Core Coed Curriculum

               I read An Echo in the Bone by Diana Gabaldon. The seventh book in the Outlander series. Tears were shed as I was nearing the end of the novel and I was having to cope with main character deaths and kidnappings. Honestly, typical for the series.

2:42pm Play Computer Game

               It looked like Kara was playing a GTA rip off

               I started out playing Dream Daddy because I wanted to finish my date with Damien. Don’t ask.

               Ending with Lego Marvel.

5:24pm Go to the bathroom FINALLY

               Kara took 20 minutes…

5:45pm Shower

I kind of combined bathroom and shower time and had to throw in changing clothes and drying my hair.

6:24pm Prepare Bread & Jam

               10 minutes to prepare means making tons of sandwiches and eating them all, because I was starving.

6:39pm Eat Bread & Jam

               Apparently, Kara is like me and hates PB&J

7:00pm Clean Up Dinner

7:12pm Dishes

7:25pm Watch TV

               Kara picked a romance

               BANDERSNATCH and then Friends because I needed to calm down.

9:55pm Sit with TV off

10:00pm Chat with someone on computer

               Went back to Facebook and Instagram

11:00pm SLEEP

7:00am Wake up

7:10am Get Yogurt

               In this case, it was applesauce.

7:25am Eat Yogurt

               Eat Applesauce*

7:50am Clean up

8:00am Challenge Complete!

Overall, the challenge wasn’t awful. I needed more food and bathroom breaks but managed with the rest of the activities. Weirdly, the thing I appreciated the most was the single tasks throughout the day. It was nice not being surrounded by distractions as I usually attempt to multitask. I also appreciate a good schedule, and this had that. What would my day be like without this challenge? Probably sitting on the couch and not moving for hours with TV on in the background and scrolling aimlessly through my phone. Maybe finding a project to keep me productive, but it would have been a very mindless day.